Yesterday, I stopped at a gas station and began to pump gas into my pickup. An attendant working the pumps came out to check in with me. As the fuel continued to fill my tank, we struck up a casual conversation. For some reason, the subject of marriage came up. She asked how long I had been married. I said, “Fifty-two next month. August 25.”
As soon as the attendant heard me share that number, she asked how we did it. I told her it was because we had learned how to forgive each other. I also said that forgiveness only happens in an honest and transparent relationship. Transparency and openness are not for the timid of spirit. It can be a brutal moment in an honest relationship.
Most of the time when I was a pastor and counseled couples whose marriage was in trouble, I could trace their division back to something that remained unforgiven between spouses. All our following conversations would be aimed by the Spirit to touch on that issue.
Each time, when Jan and I take communion together in our home, we pause and release forgiveness to each other. Doing this prepares our hearts to receive communion, and it also opens our hearts to hear the Lord.
That’s one reason why, by God’s grace alone, and not by our performance, Jan and I are still together and loving Jesus as a spiritual team after so long. The wheels that roll a marriage into the future for the long haul are forgiveness. Pursue it at all costs.
8 years ago on July 26 my Nancy and I were going to celebrate 61 years of marriage on the 27th.
God took her home on the 26th.
We made it 61 years with HIS guidance.
I miss the companionship we had, I will see her again, thank you Jesus.
Your word on forgiveness bears so much weight. It is so true, Jesus himself said if we can’t forgive our brother or sister he can’t forgive us. We actually hold God back from healing our marriages and our hearts when we hang on to a bitter root of unforgivness
Congratulations Garris and Jan on your upcoming anniversary. God is the God of the long walk indeed. My date of inviting Jesus into my heart and life is also August 25, but that preceded your wedding date by a few years but is celebrated each year since that time. I have seen God do so many wonderful things through my long walk and am still expecting to see more signs and wonders, it just gets better and better.